The Long Road Home

This last weekend I moved from a big storage space to a smaller storage space.  And I wonder about all that stuff up there.  Do I really need any of it?

A friend of mine puts things in a box in her garage by the door.  If she's not opened it in a year, she gets rid of it.... donates it or gives it away.  I'm WAY to much of a pack rat for that.  I have books that if I can find them I donate them.  But I also have chairs, way to many chairs.  I must have lived in a place where no one sat because I went overboard with chairs.  I have stools for a bar I don't own. I gotta defend them as that several times I have lived in places that had a kitchen with a big counter that was made for tall stools.

Now, I also have a single stool that I bought to fit with my drawing table... but it doesn't really fit.

And right after I bought that chair... I found on Craigslist a dential hygentist chair for $25 which was a much better fit, but I still have that chair too.  Sitting will never ever be a problem at my place.  With so many chairs, standing might be a problem.

But that's not really all that's in there... I have cards from the card game I published.  Even if I get rid of everything else, those cards will be sticking around with me.  Do you have children or, in my case, relatives with kids?  They love to hold on to your leg and rise it as you try to walk.  That's how these cards are for me.  Only... they won't ever grow up.

So the big question that i feel I have to answer here is... why haven't I started filming. 

I'm scared.  I want to try it several times on my won, without disturbing folks to see what I can do and how to do it.  I think I won't have 2 or 3 or more chances at this, I need to do it right.  I want to make my mistakes on my own without involing other people. 

I know that sounds logical, but mostly I'm just scared.  Its a search for something that I'm not sure I want to find... but I know its out there.

Mac

P.S.  But if you need a chair, email me!

I've been working the last two weeks on trying to write my intro script.  Oh, not to any movie but my intro to the people that are living where I used to live.  And really, we're talking about a lot of people and a wide range of people too.

I'm pretty sure that I'll run into an ex-girlfriend or two and that kinda scares me.  I think I'm going with this line: "Hi, I'm Mac and I used to live here".

I thought of a couple of others: "Hi, I used to live here and I'm blogging and making a short film about it and maybe a book and... have you ever been on Oprah?".  But I think that's too long.

I also thought that I should say: "I'm not here to sell you anything, but I used to live here".  that sounds innocent enough I think, it doesn't say my name and if I don't include that then forever I'll be: "Some guy at th door who isn't selling something".  Which doesn't sound that good either.

These first couple I think I'll add: "And I'll be back because no WAY I've not screwed this up in some way".  The truth hurts.

OK, I think its about time to discuss the order that I'll visit these houses.  So many are in the bay area that I think I'll visit them first and learn my lessons locally.  It makes the most sense to visit the two houses that are the closest together, both on Alston Way in Berkeley.

We moved here in 1970, I was 9 and my sister was 14.  I can't tell you how long we were there before we moved next door, but it was a fun house.  The major events I recall from that house, the split pea soup incident, playing "Murder", the cat poop in my room, a lady named Spider and a few other things.

I hope to get there this weekend. I'll get into more details, including the second house, then...

Wish me luck!

Mac

When I was growing up I put together various plastic models.  I was never big on painting them, and those awful decals were always a problem.  That meant I usually had a bunch of grey plastic planes and cars all over my room.

But always, the goal was to see if there could be parts left over.  Some models had that built in, they allowed you to have some variences by simply including parts for different versions.  Planes were famous for this. Sometimes you'd by a plane model that was named the XJ-115 Tiger, for example, butit had the parts for the XJ-115L and the XJ-115DX as well.  So there was no way to avoid the parts left over situatiuon.

So now I have moved into a much smaller place and its perfect for me... but now I have all this extra stuff.  Mostly books and things like that... but some furniture as well. Its nothing I want to throw away and I doubt its worth the trouble to try to sell it.

So am I cursed to be a packrat the rest of my life?  I consider myself a minimalist, fewer keys on my ring as possible, but I do have boxes and boxes of stuff.  Maybe because its out of sight its out of mind?  I suppose that's possible...

Mac

One of the long standing jokes in my career as a video game producer, has been the number of jobs I've had. I'm sure I can make a direct connection from the number of houses I've lived in, and my willingness to change jobs. That is one of the ideas I'm hoping to explore more as time and houses goes on.

But moving an office isn't nearly as traumatic as moving a house. At one point within SEGA I had eleven different business cards. That's a combination of promotions and the office moving. One set of cards was printed because someone higher up decided that I needed my name translated into Japanese characters and printed on the back of my card. Since several others had the same title and position, I assumed I wasn't the only guy with new cards... my mistake. It was ONLY me and to this day I have no idea why.

Also at Sega we moved from really awful offices in So. San Francisco, to big swanky building in Redwood City. I was the only IT guy at the time and when I finally got all the PC's connected and happy... I looked around, we had only 4 empty cubes. I asked the big boss how long we were planning on staying here, and the answer was: "Years". I said: "And Product Development will only hire 4 people in that time?". Product Development moved again, new set of cards printed for all, within 30 days.

Maybe if I had address labels printed for each house move, I'd feel the pain much differently.

Mac

OK, So now I am in hoouse #46. I live in the Richmond District of San Francisco.  I'm still learning the area and that takes awhile.  There is someting cool about exploring and find all the new places to eat, or buy gas or food. Also the dog gets to learn all of the new dogy smells.

So this time, since I was moving my big stuff from a storage unit, I rented a U-Haul and a couple of Pro movers.  They did great... for the most part.  They did scratch the top of my coffee table, but other than that, everything arrived in one piece.

Now the big task, arranging everything.  I have a good idea where the couch goes, and the big TV, but the now scratched coffee table seems to big for the place.  It might be a great CraigsList item soon!

I wonder if I'm not really upset at the scratch because I know that its just a fact of moving, things get dented and scratched.  Or is it that old feeling that I'm not planning on retiring here so I'm sure to be moving again with this exact same furniture.

Am I the only onr with furnature that's nice, but scratched?

Mac

The other draw back is actually more common... assuming you move as often as I do. Movers are amazing packers. They can look at a space in a box and know exactly what item goes there, even if its 5 rooms away. With the correct items, a box that is packed tightly protects the items inside from any damage.

The problem is more in the unpacking. When I open a box, I see shoes, (now I know WHICH brown box), a lamp and some stuff I don't need. So I take out the shoes and lamp, leaving the stuff I don't need right then to later unpacking. Its a correct assumption that they're safer inside the box than on the floor, while they wait to be placed somewhere in the house.

So if I never need those items, they'll stay in that box until I move again. The problem comes up WHEN I do move again. These packers don't like to use the boxes that I have so they just tape them up 1/2 full. Their new packed boxes they write "CP" on the side to indicate that these are Company Packed.

As time goes by and several moves of these 1/2 filled boxes, the number of boxes grows along with the fact that now even more obscure items are packed together. After a couple of these moves, its amazing to see the sheer number of boxes. Knowing that most are only 1/2 full is some solace but not much.

The only real solution is to unpack everything... something that I'm not looking forward to. So now, when someone asks how stuff I have I struggle with an answer. I have a one bedroom place, but enough boxes for a house but weight wise its different...

Im envious of those with just the right amount of boxes for their stuff.

Mac

As you may have noticed, I added a couple of houses. I realized that while I was living in New Braunfels Texas, I lived in a third house there. I moved in with my girlfriend and her mother had a real problem with that. Her daughter went along for some reason that I'm not aware of, and I was offered a small room in the parents house.

I was there two weeks and after I'd spent at night at my girlfriends house, the daughter of the people I was living with, I found a note on my bed. "Because of last night, you need to move out. You have one week". I didn't count it as a "house" at first because I lived there such a short time, but I realized that it qualifies under the house rule of: "I lived there with no pre-determined move out date".

Its a wonderful house, former mobile home, that the owner has built significantly on. It will be fun to go back and take a few pictures. I wonder if they still live there...

The second house is in San Francisco. I didn't intend to move in with my girlfriend, it just happened. I lived there 9 months and it fits the rule... I had no idea when or if I would ever move out. Then one day... a few words were spoken and I realized it was time to move back to my place in San Bruno. Not long after that I got an offer from Time~Warner/Tengen/Atari and I moved to Santa Clara.

Mac

Mostly I've moved by myself or with a few friends help. A few times I've had the money, or a company paid for it, to hire professional movers. They also pack which really helps a lot. Its also a little odd to come in after they've packed and see my entire life in brown boxes.

The first time I used professionals was when I moved from Santa Clara to Santa Barbara. They called the night before and said they'd arrive about 10. They actually arrived at 8am. I was completely asleep and lucky for them and me, I had on my pj's. I had my clothes in the bathroom and I told them to not pack that room.

After about an hour of packing, them not me, I realized I had moved my clothes into the bathroom but not my shoes. I was wearing only my thin slippers. When I asked one of the movers where the shoes were he said, grinning, "In a brown box". Of course, ALL of the boxes were brown boxes. and by this point, there were many brown boxes and I wasn't about to unpack them to find my shoes.

A friend of mine came by to watch the great packing and I enlisted him to give me a ride to a shoe store so I could buy some cheapo tennis shoes. I bought a pair for 9 dollars, and I ended up wearing them as my most comfortable shoes for two years until they finally fell apart. I miss those shoes.

I learned the hard way, always know where your shoes are.

Mac

The short answer is that I'll find people living in most of my old houses. I say most because I know for fact, that many of them are gone. I know the apartments we lived in when I was born is now a strip mall. I also know that the hospital where I was born was torn down a few years ago. I wonder, is THAT a sign of my life? As I age will more and more of my old houses simply cease to exist?

The longer or more in depth answer is that I'll find parts of myself I had forgotten about, either by choice or just age. I can't be expected to remember every detail but oddly I remember entire conversations. I remember making up a game in the garage at the house on Shereborn, daring one of the kids to hit a target. I made the target so small I thought there was no chance... and dang it, he hit it on the first shot. I recall I took my only option, I pretended that my mom was calling me...

So odd bits and pieces, but I think like a zombie coming back from the dead, I'll fill in the bits and pieces as I go along. The first stop, if you follow along with TripTiks, is Santa Barbara. I know exactly where the house is, and I know a great place to eat. It will be a good first stop...

Mac

Yesterday I had the good fortune to spend the day in my sisters booth at the Menlo Park Art Festival. As I was driving to her booth I drove past where I got married the first time. Its a small church not far from the freeway.  I didn't drive past it, just within a block or two, but it made me think a minute.  As important at these houses were to me, how less important are the other buildings in my life?  Or are they the same as buildings I lived in?

Is a school less important than the apartment house we lived in? I think that given the opportunity, I'll visit some old schools and use the rule of thumb: "If I can remember some 40 years later, its worth visiting if I'm in the area"

I think I can associate a school, or two, with almost every house I grew up in. That makes them life changing places in my opinion.

This blog asks how many houses have you lived in, and I think now it could also ask, how many schools... churches, club houses etc. have changed your life? Or your life changed within their walls.

Mac

I think I have everything I need... sleeping bag, tent, stove, dog and all of her stuff, camera both movie and still. Currently the plan is to leave on May 2nd for two weeks of driving madness. I've driven with the dog before so its not a big issue.  She does a lot of typical dog things, wants to go potty (on grass only) 5 minutes after we start on the road, never has enough water and ALWAYS wants a lil bit of whatever I'm snacking on.

TripTiks are an amazingly helpful tool

I suppose the best thing to do is to go to AAA and get my TripTik.  If you've never driven a great distance with these, you're missing out.  As a AAA member I can go into any office and give them a list of destinations, all 43 if I like, and they hand me a the a neartly put together itimized map showing my exact route.  Its bound together so I can flip from page to page.

I'll start in San Francisco, and work my way down the coast.  Then head to Texas, North Carolina, Indiana, Michigan and then Wisconsin. The final leg goes through Salt Lake city and then back home to San Francisco.  There really isn't a reason to not do it the exact opposite direction, but ending the long trip in Salt Lake City means that Nevada is only an hour away...

I'm certain about one thing, this sure will be interesting...

Mac

This seems like as good a time as any to start working on the list. I know how many, but I'm sure it will take time and help, to get the addresses. I'll start the work backwards but for logistical reasons, I doubt I can go in order. Lets see...

Houses listed by place or other identifier:

Number	City	Specifics	Revisited yet?
47	Northern CA	Richmond District, San Francisco	Current
46	Northern CA	Saturn Ion	Oh yes
45	San Rafael, CA	Friend's house
44	San Francisco, CA	Naples st
43	Bloomington, IN	S. Madison St
42	Ingelheim, Ger	Mainzer Straße
41	Holly Springs, NC	Fountain Springs Rd
40	Campbell, CA	Bascom Ave
39	Sunnyvale, CA	Lawrence Expressway (1 bedroom)
38	Sunnyvale, CA	Lawrence Expressway (2 bedroom)
37	Salt Lake City, Ut	Mark Twain Apts
36	Salt Lake City, Ut	House
35	San Jose, Ca	House
34	Sunnyvale, CA	Apartment
33	Santa Barbara, CA	House
32	Santa Clara, CA	Townhouse
31	San Francisco	House on Shrader
30	San Bruno, CA	Santa Clara St
29	Berkeley, CA	House on Hearst
28	New Braunfels, Tx	Home behind the home
27	New Braunfels, Tx	House next to the river
26	New Braunfels, Tx	Mobile home
25	Austin, Tx	Duplex house
24	Killen, Tx	Apartment
23	Redwood City, CA	Apartment
22	Santa Clara, CA	Apartment
21	Pinole, CA	Apartment
20	Mountain View, CA	Apartment
19	Oaklnad, CA	Clairmont house
18	El Cerito, CA	Liberty Ave Apartment
17	Honolulu HI	Cousin's place
16	Oakland, CA	Croxton Ave
15	Oakland, CA	Clairemoint House
14	Berkeley, CA	Hearst St
13	Albany, CA	House
12	Berkeley, CA	1834 House
11	Berkeley, CA	1830 House
10	Piedmont, CA	House
9	Santa Monica, CA	House
8	Santa Monica, CA	Penthouse
7	Wyndott, Mi	House
6	Detroit, MI	Ivy House
5	Mi	St Johns Apartments by the creek
4	Dearborne, Mi	Shereborn house
3	Indianpolis, In	Clarendon House
2	Mi	Golden Ave.
1	Madison, Wi	Not sure

And oddly, it still feels like I forgot some...

More to come... I think.

Mac

I am of the opinion that bitter people look back at their lives and seek, or obsess over, mistakes they made or wrongs done to them. I think it would be really easy to become a bitter person. The only real prerequisite is that you have something to be angry about... and made age. Its hard to imagine a bitter 5 year old.

One of my self realized "flaws" is that I tend to start projects and finish them only to about 1/2 or 3/4 of the way. With age, and some maturity, I have the sense to stop projects that are beyond my skill. But part of me wonders, is that just an excuse?

I can see a link in my childhood, many moves required me to stop what I was doing... pack... move, unpack.. make new friends. Basically, start it all over again. What that "it" was, was always different. Maybe by going back to all of the old houses, I can see other patterns and make connects to where I am now.

I recall seeing an HBO show, Band of Brothers. Its about one company of men in WWII. I recall one of the soliders saying: "It came to a point where you didn't want to learn the replacements names. You'd just get to know them, and then they'd get killed". I kinda felt that about friends in my area, I didn't need to get to know them... we were moving out soon anyway.

So here is the big question... how many houses. As I was writing this post I realized I had forgotten two... so now I'm at 43 houses. I'm not counting places where I lived for a week... or vacations. These are all places I moved to thinking I was going to stay for years.

I'll post the list soon.

More to come...

Mac

I'm sitting in my room, in a friends house. The wonderful economy, and my great job history, have combined to make this a difficult time for me. But how did I get here? Not so much the circumstances, but, the path.

I was born in Madison Wisconsin, and I understand I wasn't there long. I used to tell people that I was there only 3 weeks because I had a job, I had to move. I had no idea that I was foretelling the future.

The moving started because my father worked for the military, and was transferred around often. But when my parents divorced, I was 6, that's when the moving really kicked into high gear. Some of the memories are painful, some just are what they are.

Maybe by reading this blog you'll find some kinship in the transitions you're going through now, or have gone through. I hope to make some sense of all of these moves and maybe come to grips with my own love of cardboard boxes.

So pack a bag and lets go!